Oi! Vote!

Hi there!

It's mid-term election time! Very exciting!

Whatever you do today, please, please, PLEASE be sure to get out and vote today!

Remember, YOU are the decider!!

I speak to you as a reformed non-voter. My first voting experience was 2 years ago. I was 27 years old. Yes, I was a horrible citizen for the first 8 times I was eligible to vote. I'm not proud of this, but I've changed my ways! I vote! I encourage others to vote! So get on out there and vote! Polls are open early and late! Woo hoo! Voting!

Did you know that voting reduces the appearance of cellulite?*

I have also heard that it can help with erectile dysfunction and help you please your lover all night long.**

Dude, what's hotter than democracy?***

Did you know that in Australia it is mandatory to vote? When people reach the voting age, they register with the government, and if they don't vote they get fined. That is actually true. When I told them about how many people don't bother to vote here, they were baffled. Baffled!

I think the idea of mandatory voting is a bit big-brotherish, but I can also see how it could be a good idea for the U.S. We should vote on it!

You know, that could work. If mandatory voting was a ballot question, all the normally non-voters would show up to make sure it did not pass, because no one wants to get fined. If the ballot question came up every year, then it would keep people voting every year! But I digress.

Are you happy with everything in the government? Well then go out and vote to keep everything the same!

Are you unhappy with everything in the government? Well then go out and vote for change!

It is literally a numbers game. VOTE!

*Well, it doesn't
**Actually, I just made that up
***Maybe a touch of anarchy, maybe.