updates

My advisor and I had "the talk" and, after talking with another committee member as well, we have a window for my public defense lecture, sometime during the 1st week in August! I am excited, and am pulling for something like the 8th, since it will accomplish 3 things

a)give me a tiny bit of extra time (like 3 days) to finish writing
b)give the committee a little longer than 2 weeks to read the thing
c)like half of my friends will be out of town on the 1st, but will be back by the 8th, so it would make the audience full of support

The only downside would be that it would leave me only 1 week to do the revisions, but I don't foresee too many revisions (I know, famous last words) since most of the stuff will be either published or submitted for publication by the time they see the first dissertation draft.

Now I just have to remember to keep breathing.

emancipation proclamation

A couple of weeks ago, I got this horoscope, and ever since then I have been repeating the quote to myself. As I buckle down to finish my dissertation by the 15th (ACK!), I am trying my hardest to remain calm, take deep breaths, and visualize the life I want and how great it will feel to be free.

Welcome to Part Two of your outlook for the second half of 2008, Aquarius. We're checking up on how you're progressing with the challenges you were given near the end of last year. I'm hoping that six months from now, you'll look back and make the following declaration: "This is the hardest I've ever worked to be free. Liberation always came pretty easily to me before, but this year I had to find new ways -- complicated, interesting, highly advanced ways -- to carve out the space to live the life I want. I'm glad I was challenged so deeply. It has made me a genius of emancipation."

Within the next few days I hope to have an Official date for my public dissertation defense lecture. I will keep you posted.

Finishing Day

Every day I do many, many things, but most of the time at the end of the day, nothing is actually done. Progess is always made, but completion is not always acheived.

Today, however, was a day of getting things done!!

The biggest things were

1. submitting a manuscript (that is one of my dissertation chapters) to a journal for publication! yay!
2. completing analysis of the 4 boxes of slides I have been slogging through on the microscope for, oh, the past year and a half. Double yay!!

On top of that I managed to:

• go to the grocery store
• clean out the fridge (no small feat)
• go over lesson plan for class tomorrow
• do a load of laundry
• change the headlight bulb in my car, FINALLY (the bulb went out about 3 months ago, and the new bulb had been sitting on the coffee table for the last month)
• filled up the wiper fluid in the car as well (it had been beeping at me for
  the last week or so)

All in all a good day. I am happy, and tired.

News from California concerning a post-doc is still looking good, no specifics yet, but still a good place.

And guess what! Even though it took a couple of tries because all the sites promptly crashed when 8 million people tried to access them at the same instant:

dads and grads

Yesterday was my dad's birthday. I gave him a call to wish him happy B-day and to see if he had ever read the Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, which is what I am going to give him for his birthday.

I asked him if he wanted anything else for his birthday, and he told me that he just went to Wal-mart and got oil filters for the cars so he doesn't need anything at the moment.

And, yes, if I had called last week and asked him what he wanted for his birthday, he would have told me oil filters.


Today I have been in a little funk. I got an email from my advisor reminding me that I have to get 3 manuscripts submitted to graduate. While I have been feeling like I have been getting lots of stuff done and making good progress, that email just made me feel like I haven't been doing enough work or making enough progress. Because if I had been doing enough, I would be graduated and published by now. I'd probably also have a clean apartment/house, a husband, a family, and no credit card debt if I had done a million things differently in my life. So the better part of today has been spent working and reminding myself that I just have to keep moving forward and things will be OK. It is a waste of time for me to feel guilty about doing this instead of that yesterday/last week/last month, I can't turn back time, all I can do is be in the now.

And hopefully, by expressing all of that on my blog right now, I am preventing more dreams about bugs in my skin. yech!

Friends and benefits

I was very excited because I thought today I would be able to enroll in the dental plan from my new job.

But, then I noticed that to take advantage of any of the coverage (like for cavities) you have to be in the plan for 3 months, and, for major stuff, 12 months. I am not sure if it will be worth it, especially since I will probably have dental at my new job in September.

When I was in my 20s, guys who played guitar and smoked cigarettes made me weak in the knees.

In my 30s, it's a good health and dental plan and owning a washer and dryer.

It's interesting how priorities change.

My oldest and dearest friend from Las Vegas is visiting this weekend (Natedog's mom). I am looking forward to spending time with her, especially since the last time she visited me in PA it wasn't so fun. I had lived here a grand total of 2 weeks and didn't know how to find anything to do, it was August (hot and very muggy), and I had no air conditioning and no friends. Luckily it is meant to be a beautiful weekend and I know plenty of places to go and people to see.

She keeps telling me that she wants to go out to bars, since she never really does that at home, what with the husband and kids. I laughed and told her don't worry, I'll take you to my bar, and then my other bar, and then my other other bar, and then (if there's time) to a place near me that I haven't tried yet.

California, here I come

In a few hours, I am going to the airport for an early flight to California to interview for a post-doc position.

It's an early morning flight, and it is easier for me to stay up really, really late than wake up really, really early, so I took a bit of a nap in the evening and am now staying up and getting ready to hit the road.

My bags are packed, my job talk is finalized (I will practice again before I get on the plane) and I am very excited.

I was looking through my jewelery box to find the right accessory for the trip, and I found this pendant. It was my mother's and now I think it will be the perfect thing to bring me luck!

Walmart vs. Target

I don't like going to Wal-Mart. For some reason, that store makes me feel sad for humanity. Perhaps it is the bad lighting or the cool color schemes of the decor. Last night I had to get a plunger after 10pm, so Wal-Mart was my only option. The store seemed dirty and sad and the people inside it seemed like they had been beaten down by life. Even the employees just didn't have any spirit.

Target, on the other hand, is different. Whenever I am there I feel like a piece of my soul is missing, and I know that Target has the thing to fill that empty space. Today, for example, the hole was filled by clearance-priced post-it notes shaped like my initial. I think that the warm reds of the Target interior just makes me feel better. Also, the store is practically brand new so it is still clean and shiny.

It is almost like Wal-Mart is a depressed store, and Target is the same store on prozac.

The big job interview is at the end of this week, and today I am particularly anxious about it, so I fled to Target in order to find some peace by filling my life with stuff. It's not really the best way to deal with stress, I know, but it was a good escape.

Plus, those post-it notes are pretty awesome.

Yeah, I am ready to leave the northeast

Hi everyone.

I just noticed that my thermometer says that it is 46 degrees outside right now. Fahrenheit.

Dude.

It's May 13.

46 degrees is ridiculous.

At the end of the week I am going out to the west coast to give a job talk and hopefully get a post-doc position in a lab out there. If all goes well, I will be moving to California at the end of the summer.

46 degrees in May is definitely high on the list of things I won't miss about PA.

Hilarity ensued

On Sunday night, Frogweiler and I went to see the Kids in the Hall doing a live performance in a nearby town. It was so funny, it was good to see the gang together doing comedy. The majority of stuff was brand spankin' new and they mixed in some old classics as well. I was sad when the night came to an end.

I watched the Kids in the Hall way back in the day when they were on HBO, and promptly fell in love with it. It was my favorite show during my teenage years and I loved it so much that I taped every single episode.

Lately I have been thinking about this particular KITH skit because I feel like I have so much I am trying to keep track of in my life. Whenever I start getting overwhelmed I try to narrow down all the things I need to do to the 7 most urgent things, then I repeat to myself, "I have 7 things to do today. 7 things to do". Then, like the guy in the skit, I try to stay focused on those 7 things even when everything around me starts going to shit.



And this evening I had the pleasure of seeing Eddie Izzard's new standup act. I am still smiling from the experience and I am sure that tomorrow my stomach will be sore from the laughter. His stage presence and ability to act out so many different parts of an imaginary conversation at the same time is genius. Even in the cheap, nosebleed seats you could follow everything very well, it was priceless.

For any of you who are not fortunate enough to be familiar with the comedic greatness taht is Eddie Izzard, I offer this humble sample:



In zombie news, I am still a slack-ass when it comes to getting pictures off of my camera so I have no pictures from our Star Wars exhibit adventures. FTL.

But, the post office is raising the price of stamps next week, and as a consequence, all zombie postcards that I have made from some of these pictures must go!! So, if you would like to get a zombie postcard from me this week, simply drop me an email at laszy77 at hotmail dot com with a mailing address and I am happy to send one along! Zombie postcards FTW!!!

Ok, that is all for now, it is time for bed and I am reading Swiss Family Robinson at the moment (yes, I was inspired by the Emerald Nuts commercial). On the whole I am enjoying the book, mostly because of the immense irony of the family being very religious in their island home but every time they come upon a new animal or group of animals they kill as many as possible, more than they need to fulfill the requirements for their survival. A typical chapter begins with one of the family encountering a creature, the father explaining to the children what the creature is, and then the swift killing of the creature and a stew is made from the meat and clothes from the skins. I think their constant drive for building things is just a way to prevent becoming obese from eating everything on the island that isn't human*.

I understand that supporting a family of 5 on a tropical island must be rife with challenges, but seriously, it has become too predictable.

*so far there has been no cannibalism, but I haven't finished the book, so there's still an outside chance that it could happen

busy busy bee

There has been a whirlwind of activity here at the ponderosa, and much of it very good, but I feel like I have been dropping the ball on keeping my blog updated, amongst other things. I have been overextending myself socially and professionally, and I am happy that April is done, the cavalcade of dissertation defenses and meetings and classes is over and I can have more time to devote to my own work. Whew.

Last weekend I was at my friend NV's house anxiously waiting for Battlestar Galactica and as the credits for Doctor Who rolled, we had this conversation

NV: A police box? That is so wierd. Why does he travel around in a police box?
Me: Well, there is a part on the TARDIS that makes it change shape to fit in with whatever place it goes, but on the Doctor's TARDIS it broke in London in the 50s so it got stuck as a police box. He tried to fix it once, but it didn't work out. So that's why it's a police box.
NV: *stares blankly*
Me: That's why he goes around in a police box.
NV: *more staring*
Me: And that's also why I'm a dork. Because I know that.
NV: yeah

I can't help it. Doctor Who is AWESOME. I am proud of my geekiness.

Last weekend was a celebration of geekdom for me. On Saturday I found new episodes of Avatar: the Last Airbender online, yay! I watched them a few times on Saturday, and I would be watching them right now if I didn't have the site blocked on my browser during the week (a couple of work nights spent staying up too late watching it online convinced me to block it).

Then I went to the Franklin Institute (Ben Franklin Kicks Ass!) to see the Star Wars Exhibit. I went with a couple of friends and I also brought the zombies, for oodles of photo fun. As soon as I get the photos from my camera I plan a full post devoted to the day at the Franklin Institute, for now I have this teaser photo taken by one of my friends.

hectic schedules

It's been a busy busy time around these parts.

Since my last post, I found out that I got the summer teaching job *YES!* I think it will end up taking a good amount of time for me to prepare for my teaching sessions, since there is alot of information, and I want to do the best possible job I can to help these pre-med kids feel as prepared as possible for their test.

Since I need to also devote as much time as possible to finishing my dissertation and graduating, I decided I won't get another part time job or anything. I reckon I can house/dog/cat-sit and sell stuff on ebay to build up some extra cash.

Also in the past week I have seen 3 Ph.D. defenses, 2 in my department, and one in another department. All were successfull, so there are 3 more Dr.'s out in the world now. Yay!

Today I practiced the talk that I plan to give for my post-doc search and perhaps even my own dissertation defense talk. In the past, my talks have been OK, but I havbe never felt like I had a good grasp on my data and its interpretation. Finally, at this talk I felt like I knew exactly what was going on and the audience definitely reacted kindly to that (well, those in the audience that managed to stay awake at least). The professors that had seen this talk in its infancy when not all the data was in and I was struggling with depression remarked on how much it has improved.

It is good to know that my internal feelings of improvement have been translated into how I am perceived by the external world as well.

One of them said that I should have no trouble finding a job if I take this data and put it into manuscripts. From their mouth to God's ears.

I have been thinking/worrying about this talk for the last few weeks, so it is such a relief to have it done. Now it's back to the writing! Woo!

Out there in the world wide web

For the Great Interview Experiment, I was interviewed by Sarah at sensibly sassy. She posted the interview here. It was such a fun time.

Also, the people over at Schmaps decided to use one of my pictures on their Texas parks and gardens page, coolio!

There were 2 Ph.D. defenses this past week in my department. They were both awesome, and I am so proud of them for finishing up. Surprisingly, I found out that neither person had a job lined up for the fall. It made me feel alot better about having something lined up even if it isn't set in stone yet. I just have to keep on writing.

The other perk of the barrage of defenses is the post-talk celebration. I do love the taste of champagne in the afternoon. The sweet, sweet taste of free champagne.

getting it together

Finally this morning I managed to get over to the test prep/tutor place to try for a summer job. Things seemed to go well, so I go in next week for a proper interview and such. Part of the interview process is to demonstrate my teaching abilities by showing them how to do something.

So, not like "how the kidney works" or "the history of the paper cup" but like "how to make a sandwich".

Now the question is, what should I demonstrate? I want it to be easy and short, that I can easily explain on a dry-erase board, but also funny and interesting.

Some of my initial thoughts:

How to make a grilled cheese sandwich
How to change a light bulb
How to defend yourself from a zombie attack
How to make chicken soup
How to start a blog
How to mend a broken heart
How to plant a garden
How to party like it's 1999

Any other thoughts?

Also, today I managed to bite my tongue in the most agonizing way ever. I had gum in my mouth, and somehow managed to bite the underside of my tongue. Yes, the underside of my tongue. I am pretty sure that I bit part of the lingual nerve. The lingual nerve is on the underside of the tongue here:



Then it runs inside the jaw to join the mandibular nerve which eventually goes to a big nerve called the trigeminal nerve which is nestled near the ear canal and where the jaw attaches to the skull.



When I bit the bottom of my tongue, pain shot from under my tongue, along the inside of my jaw and up to my ear. Exactly the path of the lingual nerve. It's been about 10 hours since this tragic accident and it STILL hurts to move my tongue and I have a dull ache in my ear, almost like I have an inner ear infection. It's not debilitating, but it is quite annoying.

So, whatever you do, try to avoid biting the bottom of your tongue.

Tricky situations and random fun

Tomorrow I am going to go one of 7 Ph.D. defenses that are being held this semester, 7 people are graduating, and none of them are me. I came to terms with my delayed graduation already, and I am happy to be finishing this summer rather than right this second.

But still, I am not looking forward to the after-celebrations of these defenses, when faculty ask me "It's your turn next, right?" or "When are you graduating?" or "You aren't defending this month too?"

I have been slyly avoiding answering those questions for years, actually, but now I am just tired of it. So, I am trying to figure out the best crafted response. The contenders at the moment are:

"I'm graduating this summer"
"I ask myself that question every day"
"I am writing right now"
"This year has been complicated, but I look forward to defending this summer"
"Fuck off"
"I decided to get as much free food as possible and then I'm joining the circus, suckers!"
"I think you left your car lights on"

It probably won't be that bad, it's just awkward because I am so close to being done, but not quite there. There is a particular person who seems to make it a point to interrogate me about my progress randomly and remind me how much work I still have to do. I just smile and take it, but I really just want to go fart in their office and walk away.

In other news, I am completely addicted to Dancing with the Stars. I absolutely love watching these celebrities step completely out of their comfort zones to try dancing. My favorite at the moment is Adam Corolla, who is not a very good dancer, but he gives it his all and looks like he is having fun with it, even if it isn't perfect. I voted for him, twice. Yeah, I said it. I voted for couples on Dancing with the Stars, and I am only slightly ashamed to admit it!

So far still no summer job, I got all dressed up in my fancy hire-me clothes, and the offices were closed on Friday! D'oh! There is always this week.

Summertime, and a livin' is needed

So, I am going to get my Ph.D. by the end of the summer, and if all goes well, I will be moving across the country to a fantastic post-doc in a different but related field.

That is my plan.

There are lots of things up in the air, though. Like whether I actually get the post-doc (it looks like a good possibility, but nothing is set in stone yet), when and how I am going to move, where I will live, how I will fit my trip to Burning Man in, etc. etc.

But, the most pressing issue is that while my next job will not start until the fall (August/September), my current job ends in May.

So, what am I going to do this summer?

Well, I can't say that I am dreading the cessation of my meager grad student wage. I did some math and it comes out to just about $9.50 hour after taxes. This is fine, and actually pretty good compared to some other grad student stipends (but very, very shitty when compared to what people with "real jobs" make 8 years after they graduate from college). And I am sure that it is a wage that people could easily live on as long as they didn't have to pay rent, car payments, had never even looked at a credit card, and never got sick or had tooth decay.

Rather than looking at the end of my grad salary as the gravy train pulling out of the station, I see it as freedom to make enough money to pay my bills and buy groceries without putting anything on a credit card. Oh, what joyous days they will be!

But how will I make this grandiose salary?

Honestly, I don't really know yet. But tomorrow I am starting the search for a summer job.

My first inquiries will be with the local test prep/tutoring places. With the whole getting a Ph.D. and being a mentor to current university students thing, I feel like I can bring some qualifications to the table. I am going to talk to the test prep agencies tomorrow, explaining my situation and need for summer employment, and in a perfect world they'd just cut me check for one hundred grand and I could pay off all my student loans and credit card debt by May 1st. Or, they could just give me a job.

I'd be willing to settle for the job.

If that fails, next week I will sign up for some temp agencies. I can answer a phone, use microsoft office products and Xerox like a motherfucker. I would be happy to be an office temp for the summer. Taking a little break from academia would be refreshing, I think.

Any other suggestions for a good, legal summer job?

pancakes are delicious

Yes, indeed they are.

Last week I went to the doctor to renew my prescription for anti-depressants. We talked about how things have been going, and she mentioned that she started me on the beginner dosage. Since I have a giant transition coming up (graduating and moving...somewhere), she wanted to bump my dosage up to the next level.

I was hesitant to agree because I felt such an improvement with the beginner dose. I mean I was actually doing real work and was motivated to get out of bed and could think about the future without collapsing into a teary heap. But then I remembered that I would feel good and be super productive for a few days and then completely zone out and sleep all day for the next couple of days. We had the conversation:

Me: Do you think we really need to increase the dose?
Doctor: Well, like I said, you are on the minimum dose, if you want, you can take the slightly higher dose every other day and see how that goes, and if you feel like it you can go back to the lower dose no problem.
Me: Hmmm...well, I have noticed that I'll get alot of stuff done and feel really good for a few days and then do nothing for a day or two.
Doctor: Well, it is important to take breaks, I mean, you can't work all the time. It is normal and OK to take a few hours off a day or a day of here or there to recharge.
Me: Yeah, but I really mean 'nothing'. I mean, I could at least wash the dishes, you know?
Doctor: Oh, you mean you don't do anything, like not even shower?
Me: Not even that
Doctor: Then yeah, we should definitely increase your dose.
Me: Yeah, I think you're right.

So it's been about a week that I have taken the increased dose, and so far it seems to be pretty awesome. It'll take a couple of weeks for my brain chemistry to adjust, but I have noticed that my motivation and productivity has been steadily increasing.

I feel more grounded and have more confidence in myself and my abilities than I did 3 months ago, that's for damn sure.

I have also noticed that my change in mood has also affected my relationships with strangers. I have lately really noticed that people have been saying hi to me as they pass me in the hall or on the street. Like maybe I am walking taller and making eye contact more now? I haven't been making a conscious effort to look people in the eye and smile or anything, but something is different. I am going to chalk it up to the happy pills, the glorious, glorious happy pills.

In other news, my trials and tribulations with my wacked out sleep schedule have been progressing. I have managed to get out of the house at 9:30am, which is an improvement from 2pm. I've also taken some more drastic actions:

• I set the leechblock to block all the websites I like to play around on (this one, my blog reader, my flickr site and it's related fun things, the websites of my favorite podcasts, and even wikipedia) after midnight. So no more staying up until 1:30am making moo cards from my zombie pictures.
• I am going to switch one of my alarms from a beeping noise to the radio, specifically the annoying station that plays the same song every 20 minutes. Snex gave me the idea when she suggested that I am probably habituated to my alarm clocks and that is why I will still snooze a bit even with my crazy alarm prison system

The web trickery has actually worked already. The other night it was about 12:30am and I had just finished watching this week's diggnation while I cleaned up the kitchen. I decided that I wanted to check my email just one more time before going to bed, and I was DENIED by the almightly Leechblock. It was a not-so-gentle reminder to myself to stop futzing around on the web and go to bed so I can get up in the morning.

So yeah, things are pretty good, progress is being made. I am enjoying the journey.

To wrap up I wanted to share a quote from my new favorite show, Avatar: the Last Airbender. It's the most profound animated children's show you will ever love watching.

While it is always best to believe in one's self, a little help from others can be a great blessing. -Uncle Iroh

Happy Easter

Well, my Maundy Thursday hand injury was not severe enough to warrant a photoessay. I feel a certain sadness tinged with relief. I'm sure you feel the same way.

I did some spring cleaning this weekend, and found about a dozen bars of soap in my linen closet. They are all small bars from hotel rooms and gift baskets. For some reason I have kept them, just in case a baseball team stopped by for a shower, I suppose.

I moved the soaps from the linen closet to a little dish near the tub, so when I run out of my current liquid soap, I'll grab one of the bars and use it. That way I can save money. Because I probably spend like 7 dollars a year on soap.

If I can keep it up, I'll be able to use the savings here to pay off my undergraduate student loans in 2000 years.

Hmm...maybe that's not the best way to look at it.

Closing time

Since I am now jumping head first into the job search*, I'm looking for a good closing for my emails. Something professional, yet friendly. Especially since tomorrow I am going to write and ask my potential references whether they are comfortable giving me a positive reference.

Most of the time I just sign my emails with the very informal, cold and unfeeling hyphen:
-Hamster_grrl

But now I think something snappier is in order.

Best regards,
Thank you for your time,
Peace out,
I look forward to hearing from you,
Sincerely,
Vaya con dios,
Have a great day,
Cheers,
Keep on rockin',
Yippee ki yay motherfuckers,

I'm thinking either 'Best regards' or 'have a great day'.

Any other suggestions?

Peace out,
Hamster_grrl


*If anyone you know is looking to hire someone with a Ph.D. in biology, let me know :)

Tricking myself into better habits

For pretty much as long as I can remember, I have had sleep issues.

I have noticed that many people don't take sleep issues seriously. They think it is simple: just get in bed and go to sleep and when the alarm goes off just wake up. If it were that easy me and millions of others in the world wouldn't be able to tell you about late-night infomercials and Lunesta, Ambien, and other sleep aids wouldn't be on the market. It's just not that simple. It really isn't.

It is very, very easy for me to stay up late, and even more difficult for me to wake up early (unless I have someplace I need to be, like an appointment or class). And, since most of my graduate school experience has not involved a 9-5 daily commitment, my ability to get and stay on a normal sleep schedule has suffered. When I talked to my doctor about my depression I also talked about my problems sleeping (at that time I wasn't falling asleep until about 5am and then found it hard to wake up before noon, go figure). I was given sleeping pills, which I have tried using, but I don't think that is the way for me to change.

The way I see it, there are two parts to this problem:
1. I am not going to sleep at a time that is conducive to getting a good night's rest
2. I am not waking up at a time that is conducive to having a productive day

The two parts are inextricably linked, and changing one can change the other, but it is difficult.

I realized that night-time was when I watched TV. I would try taking a sleeping pill at 11 and then decide to watch the late show, then the late late show, then staggering to bed at 1:30am. So, in order to fight this I bought a timer from the hardware store and set it so it automatically turns the TV off at 10pm every night. It is my not-so-subtle reminder that it is time to get off the couch and get ready for bed.

Also, to keep myself from watching TV online all night (which I have done on more than one occasion) I put my Netflix account on hold and set restrictions on how many hours a day I could watch online TV with the firefox add-on Leechblock . I find myself doing many other things online, though, so I am looking into whether I can block the use of my web browsers at specific times as well.

Ideally, I would like to lay down with a book and read a chapter or so before gently drifting off to sleep. I am working on this plan. Sometimes I end up reading half the novel before feeling tired, but sometimes not.

My morning ritual is a little more drastic, and has not really worked well.

I used to have 3 alarm clocks, all of which were within arm's reach, and one of them was my cell phone. The alarms would start going off and I would either turn them off or hit the snooze button for 2-3 hours. That wasn't a good sleep habit.

Now, I still have the 3 alarm clocks. One is next to my bed, which goes off first and I can hit the snooze on a couple of times. The second has been moved to the shelf next to the door at the foot of my bed, so when it goes off, I have to get up and turn it off (which I do, no snooze, just off). The third alarm clock is my cell phone, which I have in a little box on a shelf. On the box is a little lock, and the key to the lock is by the door to the apartment. So, when the cell phone alarm rings, I have to get up, walk across the entire apartment, get the key, and bring it back to free my phone from it's nightly prison. One would think all that would work.

But, it doesn't.

I walk to the key on the wall, retrieve the phone, and bring it back to bed with me where I snooze for an hour (which, considering I used to snooze for 2-3 hours, it is sort of an improvement).

I figure I have to combine the alarms with something I know wakes me up: morning commitments. I have been purposefully setting up appointments for the morning hours, in hopes that if I can get at least 4-5 days of consistently waking up early, everything will start falling into place.

Monday I am meeting with someone at the Career Center to help me get my job search more organized, and then starting a regular weekly morning appointment with the writing center to help with my dissertation.

Tuesday is my regular morning writing date with DancingFish and Snex

Wednesday will hopefully be the day I go to the eye doctor for new glasses

Thursday and Friday are still open, but I was thinking about trying to get to school by 8am so I can get a free parking spot on the street and spend some quality time in the library.

Hopefully this will start to work. I don't expect to be falling asleep at 10pm and waking up singing with bluebirds at 6am by the end of the week, but if I can manage to be up and dressed and out of the house by 9am, I think it will be an accomplishment.

And, since it is 1am and I have a meeting in the morning, I should stop blathering on now. Sweet dreams.

A few days late

It's been a busy couple of days, so my Thursday blog entry was delayed until today.

Thursday was full of meetings and classes. I had my first belly dancing class in a while, and it literally kicked my ass. It had been too long since I did that many hip-lifts. I wasn't able to go to the Jan-Feb session, so I missed learning the dance that almost everyone in the class already knows. It was suprising, but welcome. During my last class I was feeling like I wasn't learning anything new, and now I have a lot to learn.

Then I went to see my favorite local band, and ogled the cutie pie young drummer. He is adorable, but 8 or 9 years younger than me. I have fun flirting with him when I run into him around town and during the early part of their show, but once 12:30am hits the crush evaporates fast. 12:30 is the time when drummer boy's young friends abandon the bar down the street, whose specials end at midnight, and come check out the show.

While I love that my favorite band is getting a bigger audience and is probably making more money because of this, the kiddies annoy the hell out of me. I mean, I did my fair share of getting obnoxiously drunk with my friends and making out in bars in my twenties, but I am done with that. Some may say that it means I am getting old, but I prefer to think that now I just know better.

On Friday I was away at a professional development conference for graduate women in science and engineering. Most of the women there were in engineering, so that was slightly disappointing, but the sessions themselves were great. Everyone there was excited to be there, and the genuine desire to help other women advance in science and engineering was evident. Each of the women who spoke during the day explained how the journey to success is not easy, and can change direction many many times without warning. All of the women stressed that the most important thing was to make sure to do things that made us happy and fulfilled. They not only dedicated time to advancing their careers, but also made sure to take time for personal development as well.

I am starting to look for my next job after graduation, so the conference gave me plenty of food for thought.